Mentality began when friends Josh and Nathan realised just how many men are struggling in silence. Mental health issues are on the rise, and while the conversation is improving, there’s still a real stigma around men opening up. For a lot of guys, admitting they’re finding things tough can feel uncomfortable and even embarrassing, with the expectation of simply ‘getting on with it’, but Josh and Nathan wanted to change that. What started as a small weekly meet-up has grown into a supportive, pressure-free space where men can talk openly, connect, and feel less alone. Here’s Josh’s story about how it all came to life.
“If you’d told me five years ago that I’d be running a men’s mental health group, I probably would’ve laughed it off. Back then, I was stuck in my own head, and not in a good way. My inner voice was loud, negative, and relentless, and social media didn’t help. I’d scroll without thinking, filling every tiny gap in the day with noise that made me feel worse. So, before my son was born, I made a decision that felt huge at the time – I came off social media completely. I knew it wasn’t doing my mental health any favours.
Someone once told me that ‘to get rid of a bad habit, replace it with a good one’, and that really stuck. I hadn’t picked up a book since school, but I decided to give reading a go, especially books on mindfulness. That first book took me ages, but it opened a door, and instead of scrolling through fake perfection online, I was learning how to manage my thoughts. I was hooked.
Where Mentality Began
Fast forward a couple of years, I’d built a daily mindfulness practice, but life still had its pressures. Even with a supportive wife and a beautiful family, I felt like I needed to talk to other men who got it. Men who understood the weight we carry but don’t always talk about.
I looked around Rayleigh for a men’s group, but nothing felt right, so I reached out to a few friends and Nathan called me straight away. He loved the idea and offered his mum’s dance studio as a space. The next week we were in there, brainstorming what this thing (which we later named Mentality) could become.
That planning process alone helped me more than I expected. And it made me realise something important – if this was helping me, it could help other men too. Mentality turns two this month (April 2026), we’re officially a C.I.C, and the support we’ve received has been incredible. Every new person who hears about us, shares our posts, or walks through the door makes a difference, not just to the group, but to the men who need it most.
What Mentality Looks Like Today
Every Tuesday from 8:30–9:30pm, a group of around 7–12 men meet in a safe, relaxed space to talk, listen, and just be themselves, and it’s completely free. Most of the men who come along are 45+, but we’ve got younger lads too. What I love most is the mix of personalities. Everyone’s welcome and no matter their background, they have the opportunity to open up if they want to.
Our sessions change week to week, and we update the week’s session details on social media, so that the men can decide if it’s something they’d like to try. Sometimes it’s a simple sit-down check-in, other times we have guest speakers sharing their life experiences, and we’ve run practical sessions too, such as first aid, movement and mindfulness.
We know how powerful physical activity can be for our mental health, which is why we’ve woven more active, hands‑on sessions into the group — from boxing and martial arts, to the self‑defence class featured in our video (which you can watch here). These sessions aren’t about fitness levels or ability; they’re about giving men the chance to release stress, build confidence, and reconnect with their bodies in a way that genuinely supports their minds.
Creating a Safe Space
When someone walks through the door for the first time, I want them to feel one thing – welcome. A smile, a cuppa, and a space with no strings attached, where there’s never a pressure to speak. Some men sit quietly for a few sessions before they feel ready to open up, and that’s completely fine. Mentality isn’t about forcing conversations. It’s about creating a community where men feel supported, understood, and part of something.
Participant Tommy shared; “Walking into my first session was one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. I was scared, anxious, and convinced I wouldn’t belong. I even turned up at the wrong place first because my head was all over the place. But the moment I finally walked through the door, I was met with warmth, understanding, and kindness. No questions. No pressure. Just people who genuinely cared. For the first time in a long time, I didn’t feel invisible.”
The changes in the men who attend are real, and you can see the weight lift off their shoulders. They think more clearly, and they know that whatever they’re dealing with, they’ve got a place to talk about it on a Tuesday night without judgment.
Participant Scott commented; “I’ve cried, I’ve laughed, I’ve nearly broken down at times, but I’ve learnt how to listen, encourage, and support others with empathy. One thing is always consistent: I leave every session feeling better than I did when I arrived. I would encourage any man who is struggling with their mental health and feels misunderstood by loved ones or friends to come along on a Tuesday, have a cuppa, and meet some fantastic people. And if it’s not for you, you’ve lost nothing.”
Looking Ahead
I’m so proud of what Nathan and I have built. It means a lot to us, as well as the men who come through the door. I want to continue to promote the group so that men know there’s free support available whenever they need it. If you’re reading this and thinking about coming along, or you know someone who might benefit, please spread the word. You never know the difference it could make.”
As Mentality continues to grow, one thing has become clear: talking helps, but moving helps too. It ties directly into our Find Your Active: Move for your Mind campaign, which encourages people to discover the kind of movement that works for them. For many of the men at Mentality, these active sessions offer a different kind of therapy – one that grounds them, lifts their mood, and reminds them they’re stronger than they think. Sometimes the smallest step can make the biggest difference.
Find out more about Mentality here: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61556691070771
Find out more about Find Your Active: Move for your Mind here: www.activeessex.org/find-your-active
